Patty Passafist

Patty PassafistMotto: Use your ass like that really annoying semi on the highway: You just can’t seem to get past it.

Position: Somewhere in the pack as long as she can get some action; occasional Jammer but only out of desperation

Number: 99

Height: Lacking

Injuries Sustained: Patty knows how to play hard and keep it safe.

Bio: From the time she was a tot with strap-onto-sneaker wheels, Patty’s doctors just couldn’t quite figure out why she was always so angry. After realizing she was bottling up all her frustrations with stupid people in the world, a prescription of roller-derby where pacifism simply isn’t allowed seemed to be just the ticket. While aggression may still be an area to work on, opposing skaters better watch out for her superior blocking skills. Finally, having an oversized booty has paid off!

Patty is currently on hiatus to protect Patty Pacifier in the womb and then take care of the future Hellion after birth.